In the next entry I shall write about the lovely night before. I solemnly promise sex, blowjobs, and homemade pesto. First, here’s the morning after.
We were walking to the subway the morning after our evening with Jefferson, holding hands. May tugged my arm as we crossed the street.
“I think I’m emotionally damaged,” he declared.
I turned this over in my head. I asked a clarifying question. He answered. Then I gave the inevitable response.
“Why do you think you’re emotionally damaged, my love?”
He shrugged. “When I went to the bathroom last night, and I came back and you were kissing him, and then you two were making out, for a lot of that I kept thinking about that thing I always talk about, you know . . . that people . . . that people make friends with me to get to my girlfriend.” He was staring at the curb as we walked.
“I didn’t read a bad reaction from you, I mean, it didn’t seem like your head was going bad.”
“No, no, it wasn’t. I wouldn’t have sat back down on the couch if it was bad. I just couldn’t help but think it, and I didn’t like that I couldn’t help it.”
I was walking sideways now, watching him. “You know, dear, I really don’t think that’s what happened last night at all. Jefferson is, well, he’s really just not that kind of person. I mean, for one, he’s far too sweet.”
He laughed a little at that. “No, people don’t usually fuck me first to get to my girlfriend. I know that wasn’t what was happening. But I still don’t like that I thought it.”
“I think ‘damaged’ is too strong a word, here.”
He shrugged again. “Maybe.”
Why am I posting this conversation? Because the shit my boy rails about, the things he says, they’re true. They do fuck with his head, and they do fuck with our relationship, and they shouldn’t.
He shouldn’t have to think this way.
14 Comments
For the record, I am now buying you this shirt and will expect you to wear it on more than one occasion.
Shirt of awesome! I will wear it at kink events and be exceptionally geeky. I relish the anticipation.
Thanks, lovely.
Or perhaps each of you is using me to get to ever more awesome sex.
I’m stealing that shirt.
And what you said about Maymay’s bum? Yes.
Or perhaps each of you is using me to get to ever more awesome sex.
Shush, you ;). You’ll give away the ending.
And what you said about Maymay’s bum? Yes.
I knew I couldn’t be the only one! I knew it!
I’m only friends with you to get to your boyfriend - especially after the whole arse thing.
So…May…you’re saying its not jealousy.
She won’t leave you. Don’t you know that?
I, too, agree with you and Jefferson about Maymay’s bum…remember I have seen it ;)!
Bitchy-
See, I have no problems with this. Just give him back eventually.
Alexis-
Of course he does? But also, even though jealously is obviously mixed in, that kind of wasn’t the point.
Kismet-
Excellent. More corroboration.
Alexis: Uhm…what?
Just give him back eventually.
I promise. The whole flighty bored now! giving-back aspect is part of the appeal.
I’ll try and remember to take the jock strap off him before I put him back in the crate.
All of the shit that Maymay shouldn’t have to think, and that shouldn’t affect your relationship won’t go away, but it may diminish slightly in time, so long as people like both of you (and Bitchy, and Calico, and a couple of others that I can’t think of right now), keep articulating both your motivation and your frustration. I’m in awe, and climbing up a steep learning curve, here.
Z-
Thank you. Very sincerely. I hope it does.
Actually i am only friends with you to get into mays pants ;-)
Okay thats a lie well sorta hes got cute buns and so do you ;-)
Unfortunately I know to well whats botheirjng him but I think Mays life and relationships have grown to such a wonderful and full degree that the past hurts cant happen now. Sadly those things that hurt inside can never go away until we learn to let go of them.
Ropenuts-
I am pretty damned sure that if May and I had a cute buns competition he would win hands down.
One Trackback/Pingback
[...] those desires!? You say this is over-the-top political correctness. Is it really? I have had my personal life actively, unendingly, torturously invaded by social mores like these because I am who I am. What mediating factor could possibly cause me to [...]
Post a Comment