I said that I am easily annoyed. However, although I live with annoyance all the time, it seems obvious that I must have figured out a way to counter it. Otherwise I would be a far crabbier person than I actually am.
The thing about annoyance is that it can’t be rationally soothed. Once that thing is under my skin, it can take years to work its way out, and all the logic and reason I possess won’t cajole the issue any faster. So it has to be approached from the side, so to speak. I have to sneak up on it.
The counter to annoyance is amusement.
Notice yet again that I haven’t said happiness. Happiness is much more open, and in some ways lacks subtlety. But I am constant amused. I like a good chuckle, a dry joke, a sardonic wit. Hell, I even like bad puns. They amuse me.
I’ve used this word before and been told that amusement is a belittling humor. I found that surprising at first, but I do see where the idea comes from. Both amusement and annoyance have an aura of detachment, or aloofness. But that was never quite my style, and I’m just as easily annoyed or amused by myself as by the world around me.
Most especially, I am amused by my constant annoyances. I find that aspect of my character just a little bit ridiculous, and worth a good chuckle. And that makes it all right; that’s how I keep from flying off the handle, and how I keep my character on the balanced side of bearable.
And this plays into my scenes as well: every time I walk into a scene annoyed, I leave it laughing.
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I feel compelled to write something about Roman comedy. It is applicable.
The Greeks invented sophisticated, clever, imaginative comedy. Aristophanes is a good example. Most of the funny was in the form of barbs, facetiousness, occasionally sarcasm; the audience laughed (we presume) at the imaginative one-upmanship.
The Romans invented buffoonery. Their greatest playwrite was Plautus. An example of one of his plays would be just like a Three’s Comedy episode. The play always involved the most loathsome, selfish, miserly creature in the cast getting kicked around.
I found it an eye-opener to discover that the Romans perceived the best way to deal with someone who was lacking in character was to hold them up to ridicule and have everyone laugh at them.
Whenever I have been at a party such as you describe, and I have chanced to be annoyed by an individual, I have always tried to laugh in their face, long and loud and hard. You cannot believe how much this pisses them off.
And shuts them up, too.
I have just discovered that via blackberry, your blog is not only more accessible, but also more elegant than either the BBC or the NY Times. And that amuses me.
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